It was a busy time over the weekend since there was so many homeworks and Vina birthday and babe got grumbie. Well Daddie's bday was in May 1st. And yes I wanted to make him happy but I don't know how cause now I am a big girl, it is hard for me to show my feeling to my parents. But I do love daddie, and mommie, a lot. (:
Today was a reallllllly hot day ! But babe was so happy makes me happy for almost the whole day! Spending time with him is the greatest thing and sleep on his arms make me feel like the luckiest girl ever!! But yaa i still had to go home, and get home, and tears ran out.. Mom yelled at dad over stupid uncle and aunt's problem. For the first time around this year, seeing the tears in dad's eyes hurt me a lot. I really feel bad for him and wanna do something about it. But I'm just mee.. helpless and useless, I can't ever done anything that makes them happy. Weird.. but that's true.. I feel really sad.. Everyone has their own sad moment, so do I. My family is just.. powerless, other families based on their money and face and just doesn't bother to think about our feelings. I don't know and not sure if it is true, but it seems like it. And to me, that hurts. Dad doesn't think before he said something and he doesn't mean it when he said it. So it's not his fault for being so lousy and stuff. He's my dad, I respect him no matter what. And no one hurts his feeling. I said so, no one hurt his feeling. Or else they will have to pay a lot more. Yes I SAID so.
Haizzzzzzzzz so stressful over family's stuff. And now babe is being grumbie again. But I think it is not really the main reason, I know he is mad at me because I am too quiet and made it boring. Uhh I tried to be happy and make him happy but it is extremely difficult for me to be talkative when I was so sad and stressful.. Sorry babe, I guess I was wrong again. Now this also hurts me makes it a double hurtful things. My mind is tired by thinking too much. My heart hurts, physically and mentally. It is hard for me to breath, and I wanna cry. I wish you'd be there for me... Ong xa oi I really need you to be here with mee.. I really want to share with you my feeling.. I feel so sad and stress and hurt and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IM EXPLODING! I know crying is not the answer or to neither to help me feel better. But I can't do anything else and I can't stop myself. Everything is burn inside me and idk why it happened. Ong xaa oii, I'm sorry for being soo uhh stupid I guess? I love youuu. I don't want you to be unhappy or grumby. It makes everything turn out badly for me and I don't know it just hurts me a lot and I know it also hurts you. Babe I'm sorrryy. I lovee youuu. YRME..
Sad pandaa.
10:14 pm~
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